An accident in a mine caused by the incompetence of the novice Tom Hanniger results in five deaths and one seriously injured, Harry Warden, who remains in a coma for several weeks. Awakening suddenly on Valentine's Day, Harry puts on his miner's suit, grabs his pickaxe, and after committing a massacre in the hospital, heads to the mine to seek Tom, who is enjoying an “underground” party with his friends. Upon arriving at the location, the miner thirsty for revenge carries out a massacre before being stopped by Sheriff Burke's bullets. Having narrowly escaped, Tom leaves the city and returns only ten years later to sell his mining company share. Meanwhile, many things have changed, and Valentine's Day, the tenth anniversary of the massacre, is approaching, but suddenly the corpses start reappearing: Harry Warden seems to be back in action!
We could define the trend that has hit American horror cinema as “the return of the already known”: continuous and meticulous re-exploration of themes, characters, and entire films that have left some mark on the collective imagination or the economic firmament of the majors. This is a maneuver that almost always ensures a safe investment for the production and makes the viewer find themselves traveling already beaten paths, comfortable ones, on which they can move with confidence and cunning. “My Bloody Valentine” does nothing but propose the return of the already known for the umpteenth time, and in this case, it does so by tripling the formula.
On one hand, we have the now well-established mechanism of the remake, since at the base of everything is “My Bloody Valentine,” a decent but not memorable slasher post-“Venerdì 13” directed by George Mihalka and dated 1981. But as often happens, the new version differs greatly from the previous one, reusing only some basic elements (in this case, the look of the killer, the accident in the mine, and the recurrence of Valentine's Day in the background) to fundamentally tell another story and with a language certainly more explicit.
The second “return” occurs in the continuous and amusing staging of clichés that carry a retro vibe that fits perfectly into the renewed attempt to re-explore and cite the golden years of American horror cinema. Someone may rightly speak of déjà-vu, but in “My Bloody Valentine,” as was recently done with the new chapter of “Venerdì 13,” the essence of the 1980s slasher has been infused, and for this reason, some topoi are brought to the stage that determine its recognizability and, substantially, its success. In this film, just as Nispel did in his “Venerdì 13,” two of the basic components, namely sex and violence, are exaggerated, creating short-term enjoyment but also sacrificing minimally intelligent development at the narrative level. In this “My Bloody Valentine,” it is a sample, bringing to the screen a very numerous series of gruesome and imaginative murders and dispensing rather explicit doses of sex and gratuitous nudity (in this, the unusual very long sequence in which the actress Betsy Rue – completely nude – is the protagonist). Offal, dismemberments, pickaxe blows, and breasts somewhat fill the glaring shortcomings of the screenplay that “My Bloody Valentine” still possesses. The story is reduced to its minimal terms, always subordinate to the action, and, although the surprise ending is not banal, the mystery mechanism does not involve sufficiently. Not to mention the ridiculous dialogues (cult phrase: “I worked for 72 hours straight, where did I find the time to be a psychopath?”) and the boring characterization of most of the characters, among whom only Sheriff Palmer, played by Kerr Smith (“Final Destination;” “Desert Vampires”) appears more intriguing for his ambiguity and incorrectness.
But we were talking about the triple return of the already known, and here comes the real non-novelty that gives an extra boost to “My Bloody Valentine;” already because in many theaters, the title that appears on the posters is “My Bloody Valentine 3D,” proposing itself, therefore, as the first horror film to exploit the new 3D technology. As we well know, since we are talking about “return,” 3D in horror cinema is not new (who remembers “Venerdì 13 Parte III – Weekend di terrore” or “Nightmare 6 – La fine”?) and is pulled out of the hat whenever cinema is in crisis. This time, it is piracy and downloading from the internet that has spread in recent years that spurs those up there to propose the third dimension in cinema again to attract more viewers to take advantage of the “novelty” in the only place that makes it possible, cinemas technologically equipped. The rendering of the new 3D is definitely spectacular, and a film like “My Bloody Valentine” exploits it perfectly using a series of fun tricks capable of really making the viewer jump out of their seat. The “amusement park” effect certainly gives an extra boost to what would otherwise appear to be a slasher like many others, and therefore, viewing the film in question in 2D subtracts a lot from the strength of this film.
However, it must be said that beyond the three-dimensional vision, the film always has some cards to play, and if the cast's interpretations do not always convince (terrible the protagonist Jensen Ackles, countered by the old glory Tom Atkins, veteran of the unforgettable “Fog,” “Halloween 3,” “Dimension of Terror,” and “Manian Cop,” just to name a few titles), some directorial ideas do. Patrick Lussier, after his debut with the original modern re-reading of the vampire in “Dracula's Legacy,” had ended up directing a series of forgettable sequels for home video – for the series “Prophecy,” “White Noise,” and the same “Dracula's Legacy” – but returns to the spotlight with great success crafting his most successful horror.
Tension in many scenes is present, blood flows in rivers, the psychopath of the moment has a good physical presence, fun (especially in 3D) is not lacking; on the contrary, a thin story, a often lacunose screenplay, a not excellent cast, and an unavoidable déjà-vu effect.
Subtract half a pumpkin from the final vote.
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